REVIEW: Women we Buried, Women we Burned by Rachel Louise Snyder

 

Up until the age of 8, Rachel Snyder was living a typical and somewhat happy life.  She grew up in a warm home, with a Jewish mother and Christian father eating brie and hummus. But then her mother died of cancer, pretty much in front of her.  Rachel was there the day her mother drew her last breath and the EMT's took her away. That's when Rachel's life was turned upside down and her father transported her to an evangelical lifestyle, a new mother, and casseroles with mini hotdogs in it for food. It also included beatings with a paddle (one of which was so hard the paddle broke), a new "mom," and no life outside of the Church, such that no music but Christian music was allowed type of no life. The author is kicked out of her home at 16 and forced to support herself. Snyder eventually gets her GED and a college education, during which time she does a Semester at Sea, paid in part by her mother's brother. 

Snyder's descriptions are harrowing to be sure and I would not recommend reading this if that triggers you, even though Snyder's way of describing her abuse has a degree of serenity and tranquility that implies much therapeutic work on her part.  She has obviously achieved a deep sense of peace with her past. I did wish that she confronted and pushed her father more and held him more accountable for the absolutely horrific way that he treated her and the other children in the family. Somehow, though, she's gracious while at the same time being angry.  It's as if she's sad for him while also being mad as hell. 

The one complaint that I had about the book was that it seemed to end too neatly. Lives are messy, even when they're not as complicated as Snyder's. I wonder if she truly felt that way or if she was just struggling to end the book and couldn't figure out how.  Having said that though, if that's my only complaint, then it was still a pretty damn good book! Highly recommended.